It's a home thing

So I was at my parents house last night therefore i couldn't be here. Did you miss me? Awwww that's sweet
As I wandered from room to room in that house I was suddenly struck by how different the house looks. The kitchen has been newly fitted  and now I can't find anything. My old room ( long since gone of course) is now a guest room etc. The past is a different country ,they say,  they do things differently there. I began to wonder at what point does your parent home stop becoming your home? A place to call your own is one of those fundamental things that you need. Somewhere that you feel safe and protected from the outside world. Where you are greeted with a warm smile and a big hug, or maby just a nod and told "theres beer in the fridge".
I've lived in halls of residence for the last year and a half and if there is one place that is not a permanent place to hang your hat its halls. Its very nature is temporary.
Don't get me wrong I loved halls and the people i lived with but it was never a place where you put down the last box after moving, look around with a thousand yard stare, and say "yeah I could really make a go of it here"
Its a state of mind. I go back to my folk house and ...well I'm a guest. I fight the urge to ask permission before using the bathroom.
I think the last home I lived in was with my ex. Counting the amount of time I lived with her and we wearn't together any more I haven't had a "place" for 3 years.
It's a sad kind of feeling really, to not belong somewhere. To lack those smiles of people who are glad to see you.
Then of course I think of the friends I've made here. the people in my life right now who make me happy. The course that I'm doing and how for the first time in a long time I feel  like I have a place. Then I realise that home isn't a building its a state of mind.
Welcome home Chrissy